Month: October 2017

The Keys To Communication That Many Couples Overlook

If you’ve just broken up with someone you still love or know that your relationship is on its way out, you and your partner may be missing a few critical, 48f5948128b6d3d7e71cb1eb7b92d298_two-types-of-listening-863-430-ccommunication skills. Without the ability to both clearly express yourself and attentively listen, even the most exciting relationships tend to fizzle out. Following are a few, simple tips for improving your communication skills. These can help you save your relationship, whether your union is bound to split or you’ve split up already.

Learn How To Offer Your Undivided Attention

Many people choose to split up with their partners simply because they do not feel as though their wants, needs, and wishes are being heard. You may be guilty of looking just beyond your partner’s shoulder, to check out the television screen, or pay attention to what other people in the room are doing. This is common in committed relationships given that people have a tendency to take one another for granted the more familiar they become with one another. To overcome this, practice maintaining a comfortable level of eye contact in all of your conversations, and in giving people your undivided attention when they expect it. This will probably involve learning how to employ more socially acceptable habits in terms of your mobile phone usage. Make a point of never texting, reading texts or browsing the web while talking with a close friend. This type of multi-tasking drives people crazy and it’s also a clear sign that you don’t think someone is truly worth your attention and time.

Think Back On Past Conversations

Understanding the importance of good listening skills will give you the ability to review your past conversations and identify areas in which you may have gone wrong. For instance, there could be something critical that your partner has been trying to communicate, whether directly or indirectly, for quite some time. This could be as simple as wanting you to clean up after yourself a bit more, needing more help with the household finances, or hoping for a deeper level of commitment. Although you may be willing to accept that your own communication skills are sub-par, this does not mean that you should automatically assume that your partner is great at communicating. This could be someone who has a hard time clearly phrasing his or her thoughts and opinions. Not only do you have to improve your own communication skills, but you also have to account for the areas in which your loved one may be lagging. Many couples make it for years without perfecting their communication skills. More often than not, they simply adapt to each other’s style of communicating while gradually becoming better listeners.

Silence Is Communication

Communication is far more than a simple back and forth dialogue between two people. Each partner has to learn how to properly code or phrase his or her message before sending it. Both must learn how to listen attentively and decode or comprehend the words that are being shared. Even silence is an important form of communication. Think back on all of the times when you were greeted with seemingly cold silence. Find out what the underlying message was. Sometimes, people start communicating with silence more than words because they understand that their words are neither being heard or ultimately understood.

Establish Who You Want To Be As A Communicator

Don’t make the mistake of communicating rashly, when under emotional pressure, or when you’re simply too frustrated with your partner to generate a loving response. Find out who you want to be a communicator. To ensure relationship success, check out before choosing your communication style. You may find that you are far better in relationships when you’re patient, open, direct, and compassionate in your speech, rather than cold and aloof.

Dealing With Dramatic Differences In Communication Styles

Some people aren’t all that keen on telling their partners that they love them. Despite having all the love for their partners in the world, these individuals prefer to show their respect and admiration, rather than simply talk about it. If you’re with someone who rarely says the words, “I love you”, you have to account for the fact that your partner may have other ways of expressing this sentiment. People are different and thus, they’re guaranteed to have different ways of sharing their emotions. It isn’t possible to have a successful relationship with two, dramatically different communication styles if neither partner is willing to adapt. In this instance, it’s necessary to either encourage your partner to vocalize his or her romantic feelings more or to simply adjust to your partner’s less direct way of expressing love.